Have you ever been cruising along writing and then “bang” you hit a wall, you get stuck on a metaphor? Or maybe you should have used a simile? You think and think, but they all sound so cliché.  But you do know that YOU ARE stuck.  You just can’t find the exact phrase for your paragraph and you are about ready to throw in the towel.   However, don’t bite the bullet, yet.  You still have another hour of writing left today.  Oh well, try not to rack your brains over it.  

Where did all these phrases come from anyway?   Come to think of it, where did the phrase “rack your brains” come from?  Evidently, the origin of this expression came from a medieval instrument called a “rack”.   It was used to torture prisoners by placing the victim’s hands and legs in a rack type apparatus and then the person was stretched over rollers slowing dislocating and tearing the limbs from the body.  This gruesome torture is compared to “racking” your brain when you are trying to detach your ideas, words or a memory from your brain and it’s torture to do so. 

Do you get writers block, while torturing your brain for the perfect words that fit your scene to a tee?  All writers do.   Don’t get hung up on semantics, you have to keep writing.  It’s just a draft.  Move on. 

The best way to get off the dime is to skip the perfectionism and move on by the seat of your pants.  Remember that getting in your word count is the goal, and getting it down on paper is more important.  The perfect phrase can come later; besides many phrases have lost most of their impact because of overuse.  So don’t be lazy and fill in with a trite simile.  Be more off the cuff and stick to your guns when it comes to your writing goals.   Move on without the perfect phrase. 

Besides if you push the envelope, that perfect phrase will be there later or maybe it’s not needed in the scene after all.  You get the gist of it.  

Here are some a few of my favorite phrases or words translated:

• Synonym- a word you use when you can’t spell the other one.
• Syntax- a way in which you pay for your misdemeanors.
• A brief- Why do lawyers write a 10,000 word document and call it a “brief”?
• Parasites- What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.
• Pharmacist- No, it is NOT a helper on a farm.
• Polarize- No, it’s NOT what penguins see with.
• Toad- What happened to an illegally parked frog. 
• Vacuum Cleaner-  A broom with a stomach.
• A writer is somebody for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people. -Thomas Mann

What are your favorite clichés and quotes?  Have you heard any new “go to” phrases? 

As children across the country start school, we as parents need to remember one very basic safety rule:  if your child rides a bike they need to wear a helmet.  Their brains will thank you. 

As parents, we’re not idiots.  All parents worry about their kids’ health and safety. We protect our children with cupboard latches, electrical plug covers and car seats, but when it comes to our kid’s recreational activities we relax the overprotective paranoia and give in.  I know.  I do it too.  I see kids riding bikes and skateboarding through my neighborhood streets without helmets. My neighbor’s give-in too. 

And yet, sports and recreation accidents, such as bicycling, skating and skateboarding account for 10% of all head traumas.  Of these head injuries 88% of that could be eliminated if helmets were worn.  Then why do only 8% of all riders wear helmets?

In some states, like mine, it’s mandatory to wear helmets while riding bikes, but not for skateboarding or skating, or even motorcycle riders do not need helmets.  Really?   Riders, you gotta wear helmets! Parents, you gotta get your kids to wear helmets!  Not encasing your head in this protective layer when you’re moving on anything except your own two feet is just stupid.  Plain stoopid.  Helmets protect the head from injury.  Think of jello in a jar shaken up.  That’s what happens to your brain if your head hits the pavement hard.

Why do parents let their kids ride their bikes or skateboards without helmets?  We parents give in when our children complain that their helmet messes up their hair, or that their helmet makes them too hot, or it’s not “cool” to wear a helmet.  My kids have also pleaded with me saying, “mom, we won’t fall off our bike.”  And for the most part they do not.  “But,” I remind them, “we always wear seatbelts in the car, and we’ve never had an accident.” 

Maybe we need to be reminded ourselves on what can happen to their brain when it’s not protected should they fall.  Demonstrate to your kids how a helmet can protect their precious brain by dropping an egg into a styrofoam lined box.   Then drop the egg on the pavement.  Point made.  The helmet cushions their head. 

My kids ride bikes, skateboard and play hockey.  When I see them, they are wearing helmets.  However, I was horrified by a youtube video I saw of my teenage son preforming skateboarding tricks sans a helmet.   If your stomach can handle it, check out the first few seconds of the attached skateboarding video where my son flew over a staircase and landed smack-dab on his back and conked his head!  Turn up the sound and you can actually hear the “thud” of his noggin hitting pavement.  Not cool.  He is a poster child for why kids SHOULD wear helmets and the motivation for this blog.  And yes, he has since been reprimanded (so no hate emails please) and he does get up and walk away.  He is reminded over and over to wear a helmet.  He wears it while ice skating and we now pray he wears it skateboarding, even when we’re not looking. 

Kids wear helmets!  Your parents are not being overprotective paranoia freaks; it’s just one less thing for us to worry about.

Do you have your kids wear helmets?  Is it a law in your state? 

 I was horrified by this youtube video I saw of my teenage son preforming skateboarding tricks sans a helmet.

“An estimated 500,000 persons per year in the United States sustain a brain or spinal cord injury. In fact, injury is the leading cause of death among children and teens. The most frequent causes of these injuries are motor vehicle crashes, violence, falls, sports and recreation. The good news is that most injuries are preventable!” ThinkFirst

Go to the ThinkFirst National Injury Prevention Foundation’s web site to learn more about programs aimed at helping people learn to reduce their risk for injury.  www.thinkfirst.org

CPSC in cooperation with Circus World Displays has asked consumers to stop using the Levana Wireless video baby monitors.  The wiring in the baby monitor camera can overheat and emit smoke, posing a burn hazard to consumers.  There have been several reports of the camera portion of the monitors overheating and smoking. No injuries have been reported.

This recall involves Levana wireless baby monitors with model number LV-TW300. The receiver front is white and green with six round buttons and the printed word “Levana”. It is 7 inches tall and includes a stand/base. The camera is all white, about 5 inches tall and is attached to a 3 1/2 inch long white base. The camera can rotate and swivel in various directions. The camera and receiver each has its own A/C adapter.

The product is manufactured in China and sold at BB Buggy & Health and Safety stores nationwide and on the Internet between February 2010 and May 2010 for about $200.

Consumers should immediately stop using and return the baby monitor directly to CWD for a refund or replacement with a different model. For additional information, contact Circus World Displays toll-free at (866) 946-7828 

*  Twitter – a place to talk to yourself, publicly. 

* I use to think a tweet was a sweet treat for a tweedy bird, not a message of up to 140 characters shared on Twitter.

* On twitter, breaking news spreads like wildfire—140 characters at a time.

* I always feel like I’m tweavesdropping on other people’s conversations.

* And then how do I jump in a conversation?  I’m still learning my twetiquette.

* What is scary is that Twitter is “over capacity” during the prime work hours.  Who’s working, if everyone is tweeting? 

* Left on voicemail; “Hi Sue, this is Kristen, Twitter was down this morning.  Call me right away when you get this message.  I’m dying to know what you had for breakfast.” 

* In my business meeting this week I said , Hello all my tweeple…um people.

* I have finally learned to stop calling it “Tweeter”.  It’s Twitter.  And people tweet, you twit. 

* Maybe someday I will get tweeting and become a full fledge twanthropologist.

* What’s worse than your dad following you on Twitter?  Your boss is following you. 

* If someone is Twittering alone in the forest, and nobody else is there to receive the tweet, is it just a 140 character blog?

* When I begin to talk too long, my husband smiles and says, “Talk in tweets honey, brevity”. 

* Twitter is like hitting “reply all” to the universe.

* Twitter acronym for “Typing what I’m thinking to everyone reading.”

* Twitter definition: “a short burst of inconsequential information,” like “chirps from birds.” -Jack Dorsey creator of Twitter. 

* Twitter like the chatting at the water cooler on steroids. 

* Twitter Tantrums, really?  Swapping barbs on Twitter is not a good idea.  Tiny Twitter tirade… don’t do it! 

* I may turn into an enthusiastic hashtag machine.  #hashtag #gettingtwitter #lovetwitter #Imatweeter #Imjustsaying  #helloanyoneoutthere

* Twitter is an addiction worthy of a 12 Step program.

* Hi, my name is @mommytwitter, and I’m a Twittaddict.

* You’re addicted to twitter when you tweet your partner to turn out the light, when you’re both in bed.

* Twitter is like crack when you realize Twitter should be called “Twitch” for how compulsively your fingers are at needing to keep typing something.

* I require random tweets and blog posts from random people to make it through the week.

* My tween kids think my tweets and blogs are a confetti bomb of our small embarrassments. 

* Twitter is only 140 characters? Don’t worry my editor is good at eliminating “unnecessary characters”. 

* I just use Twitter, so I can talk the goofy Twitter-speak.

* I think I’m going to have to outsource my tweeting to India- ghost tweeting.

* How many tweets can a twitter tweeter tweet if a twitter tweeter could tweet?

What are you favorite Tweets? 

When I’m not writing, running, or hanging with my family, I work.  I work a LOT.   I have worked in the sales industry forever.  I travel the country meeting clients.  So you ask, “Pam when do you have time to blog?”   It’s true that I am one those lucky few, or cursed few, that can exist on three or four hours of sleep a night.  That leaves a mere twenty hours a day to accomplish a lot of running, writing, mothering, wifing, friending, working, eating, showering (on some days) and tweeting.  Stop.  Wait a minute.   Back up.  You tweet? 

Yes, I Pam Laux, tweet.

 But, “why?” you ask. 

My answer on why I have now joined the millions on Twitter is how else could I follow other successful people with my same quirky mix of interests?   

At first, I did not get The Twitter.  I have to admit I was a twit when it came to tweeting.  I set up a Twitter profile and let it be.  I realized that no one was “following me”.  Even after a few weeks I had three or four people following me, but I did not know if it was proper twetiquette to “follow” them back.  That used to be called “stalking”. 

Early on I came to the conclusion that tweeting was not for me.  Clue #1: No one could find my Tweetering Profile.  Clue #2: I couldn’t remember how to find me.  Clue #3: I did not know how to write (Tweet) in 140 characters or less.  (Twitter only allows 140 characters at a time.  Most tweople will tweet their 140 characters and then direct their followers to a web site for more information.)

I let my twitter account lie dormant.  A year later, after listening to advice from fellow writers and agents that a social platform is necessary for new authors, I began to experiment more with twitting.  I really was trying to be a good Twitter netizen-but I still was not getting the hang of it.  I did, however learn to stop calling it Tweeter. 

So why do I tweet? Why should you?

In a nutshell, the main advantages of Twitter are: following, advice, news and mentors.

Following:  If you have a passion for something, people that have that same passion will want to follow you or you could follow them.  I’m a working mom that likes to write and run.  Not necessarily at the same time.  (However some of my best ideas have come while running.) A lot of my microblogs and fiction writing is for a specific group.  I write about strong female protagonists in tough, almost thriller situations.   Twitter seemed like a huge time sucker, but then it was hard to ignore that working mothers were making time to twitter and surf the blogosphere after working all day. 

From a writer’s perspective I use tweeting (or micoblogging) to help guide my followers to my blog, who then read my posts and leave comments.  Blogging is increasing in popularity as a way for people to self-publish their insights on the Web.  If someone likes the blogger’s personality and voice, they will most likely want to follow that blogger’s writing.    Hint, hint: follow my blogs. 

Advice: Twitter has become a place for tweople to reach out to others for current advice. 24/7 you can get up-to-date advice tweets about almost anything, almost anywhere.  You can get advice on a local restaurant review, a fun place to vacation, what to do with an ill pet, the score of your son’s soccer game and why there are fire trucks down the street and so on. 

News:  We live in an era  of instant information.  We want our weather, stock quotes and breaking news at our fingertips. In the Twitterverse the minute something happens it’s out there on someone’s twitter account.   Twitter has become popular because someone can see something happen right in front of them, tweet it out to their friends and followers, then these followers can RT( retweet or resend) it out to their followers, and on and on.  This allows “instance news”, often times before a news crew can respond.  The free nature of this written expression is transforming the way people, consumers, companies and journalists work together to report, filter and break the news.  Just this past week the bidding war between Ryan and Cuban for the Texas Rangers was followed minute-by-minute on Twitter.

Mentors: Twitter can also help you keep informed on your favorite hobbies, mentors and celebrities. If you are a gardener, you can follow other gardeners and get up-to-date information and daily tips from top gardener mentors. What better way to learn your hobby than from experts.  And if you need to know how to keep your Clematis recta Purpurea from flopping over from its weight and to stand upright, you can tweet to your gardening followers for help. 

If you are still not getting The Twitter, I think you could love it for the utter brilliance and goofiness, or simple professional brevity, of the Twitter community.

Twitter, Facebook, Blogging…it is changing the way we live, communicate and socialize.

To the rest of the Twitterverse I say Happy Tweets!    

Are you on Twitter?  Do you have a blog link you want to share here?  Feel free to comment.

For more information on Twitter benefits, check out Kristin Lamb’s book: We are not alone: The Writer’s Guide to Social Media.  http://whodareswinspublishing.com/Writers_Guid_Social_Media.php For information on how to set up Twitter or a Blog site visit Fun City Media;  http://funcitysocialmedia.com

I Tweet in My Sleep. Tweet. Tweet.

As we descend from 30,000 feet early Sunday morning, I once again find myself upon the eve of one of my business travel pleasures…a side trip.  I am due in meetings in the San Francisco area first thing Monday but in order to get the best airfares, I chose to fly in Sunday.  

I had planned to spend the day in my Bay area hotel working onmy presentations, taking a bubble bath, ordering room service , and curling up in my king sized luxurious bed with a novel.   But after completing all my work on the three hour flight, I decided I should take a side trip to Napa before settling into my hotel for the evening.  I thought, what the heck, if Elizabeth Gilbert can travel to Italy, India and Indonesia in search for everything and document it in Eat, Pray, Love,I can plan a solo trip to Napa in one day in search of Food, Wine, Enjoy and document it in my blog. 

As we descend into San Francisco International Airport I daydream about driving through vineyards, stopping here and there for a wine tasting and picnicking in the beautiful countryside.   

Life is good.

Within thirty minutes of landing in SFO I am navigating my rental car toward the Bay Bridge.  I had been to both Napa and Sonoma on several occasions in the past.  Never in the summer.  Never on a weekend. Never solo.   I had no idea on what to expect.  I had little time to research the wineries, but I knew if I traveled North on Highway 29 I would end up in the heart of Napa Valley, and have my tantalizing pick of dozens of vineyards to wander and ponder.  Since I was solo and I was my designated driver, I planned to do more exploring than tasting and more spitting than sipping. 

As I crossed San Francisco bay the blue water stretched all around me, I inhaled the marine air.  The summer landscape in the bay area came as a pleasant surprise.  The ridges and hills were a golden maize dotted here and there with desolate green trees.   I have been to the area many times, but never in the heat of the summer when it hasn’t rained since April.   The highways were surrounded by rolling hills that no one had bothered to irrigate.  The terrain was parched, but the landscape was beautiful.  I had always been to the area when the hills were an emerald green and I loved it, but this drier, hay like landscape was delightful.  I already knew I had made the right decision to journey to the Valley.

Traffic was light since it was before ten am.  On most week days you could drive from historic downtown Napa, at the bottom of the valley, to Yountville (a culinary boomtown) in lower Napa, to St Helena the middle of Napa, ending in Calistoga, near the north border of Napa County, in an hour.   Depending on your stops at the over 200 wineries in the valley, this hour drive could stretch into a day or for some tourists several days.   

By the time I drove through Napa downtown the traffic was beginning to back up.  On the West side of 29 , I passed Moet et Domaine Chandon in Yountville.    I am not a fan of sparkling wines, so I did not stop.  I heard it is worth the stop for the views.   In fact, Highway 29 is picturesque with acres of vineyards sitting majestically up the hillside on either side.    I began seeing wineries and vineyards galore, about every hundred yards. 

My first stop was at the 130 year old Oakville Groceryat Highway 29 and Oakville Crossroads, about 15 miles northwest from Napa downtown.  Every time I travel to Napa I stop there.  The general store and deli carries a wide range of unusual groceries and picnic supplies.  I purchased a bottle of my favorite Napa Valley whole grain spicedmustard to bring home (great as a dip with pretzels) and a deli sandwich of turkey and brie.  I was starving and decided not to wait to eat at one of the many restaurants. Many Napa Valley wineries offer picnic facilities.  And nothing is better than tasting a couple of great vintages, and then buying the bottle of wine and parking your friends and family on a picnic bench to enjoy the wine and eat lunch in the charming countryside. 

As I ate my sandwich on the picnic table, the view of the neat rows of vines a few  feet away was spectacular.  It was nice to unwind. The valley air smelled of hay, sage and country living.  The birds were bustling and chirping and the sun was warm, but not hot. 

From Oakville Grocery, I could literally walk across the street to Napa Wine Company.  The little town of Oakville is at the rim of the Mondavi vineyards.   I did stop in the Spanish mission styled Robert Mondavi vineyard  just northwest of Oakville.  My stay involved a quick stroll through the grounds and gift shops.  I did not do a tasting.  Mondavi is perhaps the best known winery in Napa Valley. Since the tour is optional; take it if you have time.   I didn’t have time this trip.   

As I drove through Rutherford(one mile northwest of Oakville), I passed Cakebread, Sawyer, Suprey, Opus One, to name a few. My next stop was Peju, a French provincial winery on the east side.  The driveway, pristine gardens and tower drew me in.   It was still too early for a wine tasting, so I lingered in the tranquil gardens.  The Tower is the tallest building in Napa. 

From there I meander past Caymus, Frogs Leap, Beaulieu, Mumm, Rutherford Hill; the wineries fly by every other driveway on this dusty two- lane road, intimidating but welcoming.  There’s also an Olive Oil store, but I can’t remember the name.  Yes, they grow olives too!          Does anyone know the name?

I stopped at Grigich Hills.   

I was met by a friendly dog, as I casually walked right up to the vines and photographed a bunch of green grapes with venous leaveson a post marked 2000 Cabernet Sauvignon.   

For all you wine connoisseurs, if you haven’t stopped reading this blog by now, I did actually taste this time.  I won’t bore you with all the details of my choices, but Grigich Hills has always been a favorite.    

I held up my glass.  I took a good look, I sniffed once or twice, I swirled (it’s called volatilizing the esters, but who am I trying to impress?), I sniffed again; at last, I took a sip!  I swirled the wine in my mouth, held it there for a few seconds, then I spit or swallow.  Again and again. Taste, sip, enjoy.  A vibrant and flavorful experience lingered in my mouth.  A nice first flight.    

As I continue northwest on Highway 29, I visited various tasting rooms.  I soon realize that the swallowers far outnumber the spitters. I was a spitter, and felt I had to explain I wanted to preserve my palate (and my sobriety). 

My last stop was at one of my favorite NAPA wineries, V Sattui in St Helena.  I hit the jackpot.  They were having a chocolate and wine tasting that day! Score!  A two for one tasting.   V Sattui  is a unique wine country experiencewhich includes picnicking  amongst the vineyards or beneath the centuries old oak trees.  V Sattui has an awesome Italian marketplace with delicacies prepared by chefs. 

Wine AND Chocolate Tasting TODAY!

By now the tasting bars were four deep.  My server was friendly and informative.  After my fill of award winning wines and mouthwatering chocolates, I decided to head back to my hotel.   Highway 29 was a single file lane headed northwest whenI left V Sattui, so I was thankful I decided to leave when I did.  I can only imagine the traffic in a few more hours as the wineries begin to close around 4-5 pm.

I stopped once more to photograph the summer vineyards heavy with bunches of grapes in marching row after row  of vines that have been methodically set ten meters apart, enough for a tractor to pass between them. 

I returned to my room before night fall, popped open a bottle of my private label reserve, and while soaking in my bubbling bath, I toasted myselffor my good sense in touring the Napa Valley.

Have you been to Napa?  What is your favorite winery?  I’ll have to plan my next trip there during the CRUSH season.

The CPSC announced the voluntary recall of 30,000 Nap Nanny® portable baby recliners. CPSC is investigating a report of a 4-month-old girl from Royal Oak, Mich. who died in a Nap Nanny® that was being used in a crib. According to preliminary reports, the infant was in her harness and found hanging over the side of the product, caught between the Nap Nanny® and the crib bumper.

CPSC and Baby Matters are aware of one other incident in which an infant became entrapped when the Nap Nanny® was used in a crib, contrary to the product instructions. In that incident, the infant fell over the side of the Nap Nanny®, despite being harnessed in, and was caught between the baby recliner and the side of the crib. The infant sustained a cut to the forehead.

CPSC and the firm have received 22 reports of infants, primarily younger than 5-months-old, hanging or falling out over the side of the Nap Nanny® despite most of the infants being placed in the harness. One infant received a bruise as a result of hanging over the side of the product.

Infants can partially fall or hang over the side of the Nap Nanny® even while the harness is in use. This situation can be worse if the Velcro™ straps, located inside the Nap Nanny® cover are not properly attached to the “D”-rings located on the foam, or if consumers are using the first generation model Nap Nanny® that was sold without “D”-rings.

In addition, if the Nap Nanny® is placed inside a crib, play yard or other confined area, which is not a recommended use, the infant can fall or hang over of the side of the Nap Nanny® and become entrapped between the crib side and the Nap Nanny® and suffocate.

Likewise, if the Nap Nanny® is placed on a table, countertop, or other elevated surface and a child falls over the side, it poses a risk of serious head injury. Consumers should always use the Nap Nanny® on the floor away from any other products.

The recalled Nap Nannys® were sold at toy and children’s retail stores nationwide and online, including at www.napnanny.com, from January 2009 through July 2010 for about $130.

The recalled product was manufactured in the United States and China.

For more information, contact Baby Matters toll-free at (888) 240-4282 or visit the firm’s website at www.napnanny.com/recall

Nap Nanny

The U.S. CPSC announced a voluntary recall of Kariño Baby Pacifiers. Consumers should stop using the pacifiers immediately because the nipple can separate from the base easily.  In addition, the pacifier handle is too long, the mouth guard is too small and there are no ventilation holes on the mouth guard. The pacifier could pose a choking and aspiration hazard to young children.  The pacifiers were made in Mexico.  About 44,900 pacifiers were distributed by Antonio Flores, of San Ysidro, Calif and sold at independent grocery stores in California and Texas from October 2009 through March 2010.

“Kariño” is printed on the handle side of the mouth guard, and “Mygra” is printed on one side of the handle. The nipple is filled with corn syrup.

Here are my random observations and other random thoughts that were comprised from my list of what I have learned and observed over the past week and over the years.  As a writer, when I get a random thought, I usually jot it down in my notebook wherever I am, and whenever the mood strikes me. A lot of times, I’ll read these one-liners later and wonder; what was I thinking?  Where did that come from? So don’t ask. They made sense at the time! Enjoy and let me hear your thoughts about your summer so far!

• Is it just me, or did the World Cup go on forever? 
• Now that Spain has won, can we go back to forgetting that soccer exists?   ew 
• Arm your vuvuzelas, my house is too quiet while my kids are away at camp.  Yes, I’m complaining. Surprise. Surprise. 
• AND the Vuvuzelas are not meant to be blown in the dogs ears. 
• OK, no more on the skinny horns, I just like saying the word, “Vuvuzela”.  I’m just saying.  
• So on this whole spy thing; if these are the Russian A-team how we’d catch these James Bond wannabes with their sloppy spycraft?
• Despicable me, cute.  Mel Gibson, Despicable him.  Lindsay Lohan , Despicable her. 
• “I’m Bored, Mom.”  Summer is in full swing.
• ‎Yes, summer is in full swing.  It’s a skinfest at the pool, at the beach and even shopping.  I am starting to sound like my mom; “Where’s the rest of your outfit?”
• Summer-where according to my hubby, it’s too hot outside for picnics, but when he is given the choice between obtaining his food from an adorable wicker basket or from a flaming grill, he will always pick the grill. 
• Summer - when the  flies steal meals from the hard working ants.
• Did you know some meat flies can smell meat from a mile away?  
• Summer – when the meat files stay around for dessert. 
• Summer- where you wake up every morning excited to spend a full day with your children, but go to bed every night praying for school to start.
• I learned that Silly Bandz DO clog a pool filter. 
• I’m happy it’s July, where other people have my kids for a week!  (JK, kids… Really.)
• I learned that this week was humid and a good week for hair products. 
• On my airplane this week there was a baby in front of me that insisted on standing on his mom’s lap the entire flight.  Good thing we weren’t going to China, she would have needed thighs of steel.
• I offered to help get the baby to settle down and to calm the other passengers, but they didn’t want my sedatives.
• Not what you’re thinking! The sedatives were for all the adults around the baby, not the baby.  (Well, all the adults, except the pilots.) 
• The baby finally sat down because the mom threatened to take him to see Santa Claus when we landed.  (All kids are born with an instinctive terror of Santa.) 
• While driving through the farmlands of Indiana, I saw a sign which read, “Used Cows for Sale”. What? Really?  
• With teens when traveling we get two rooms now.  I don’t miss the kind of family togetherness that was only achieved by cramming five people into one small hotel room. 
• With older kids, I don’t miss buying tacky souvenirs. 
• There are dozens of different ways to wear my convertible, reversible, easily packable dress that I brought on my vacation and I can only figure out one -hanging in the closet.   
• Gypset dresses, huh?  A cross between a gypsy, jet-set, bohemian, mini, maxi dress…but it packs well. 
• Summer hockey is odd; sitting in an ice rink watching hockey when it’s 102 degrees outside.
• Hockey dad, when in doubt, do NOT – I repeat- do NOT punch your son’s hockey coach. 
• R.I.P George Steinbrenner. Best Seinfeld episode; George and George. 
• George Steinbrenner hours after getting into Heaven, fired God and told Jesus to lose the beard.  Jay Leno
• Bad Apple. Hey Steve, duct tape costs a few cents versus a $30 bumper iFix. 
• Mel Gibson uses the new F phone.  
• Golf, I watch it to see what John Daly is wearing.
• The blond bomber ball buster sets the style for the golf course with his purple paisley pants. 
• The British Open is not all flat; some bunkers are so huge you can lose children in them.
• Who cares about the golf scores, the scenery is great. 
• So how does Author, James Patterson publish two or three books a year?  My writing goal is to write as many words this year as James Patterson wrote last week. 
• My most satisfying task today was crumbling my sign, “No Chocolate-Ever!”

How’s your summer going?  Are you traveling?  Where’s your favorite city to visit?  What are your favorite things to do while visiting a new place?

 I love to hear comments back, and feel free to post them on the blog under the comment button.  I get a lot of emails from my readers but feel free to post comments too.   Follow me on twitter, where most of these random thoughts originated.  Twitter: pamlaux

As a child, growing up in the Chicago suburbs, we would often sing a song while swinging on our swing set with these lyrics; “Mrs. O’Leary kept the lantern in the shed, and when her cow kicked it over, she winked her eye and said, ‘there’ll be a hot time, in old town tonight.’ ”

The song referred to the great Chicago fire that occurred 100 years earlier from my childhood years.   Even though the cow legend was made-up by a Chicago reporter who thought it would make for a colorful story, it always stuck with me.  Just like the city of Chicago, it sticks to you. 

Frank Sinatra sang it well, “Chicago is; My kind of town”.   Chicago is; a world-class city, a melting pot for all types of people, art, business, recreation and culture. 

Once you have visited Chicago you will understand how the city has a little of everything. 

If you set aside the traffic jams on the Chicago expressways, Chicago will suck you in.  Whether it’s the culture, its down-to-earth people, its great restaurants, its lakefront and its river, it always makes my jaw drop when I step into the city.  And yours will too.   

I am easily awed by the energy of the throngs of people as they shuffle through the heart of steel and glass skyscrapers pulsating on every city block.  I am just as easily awed by Mother Nature as I jog along the shores of the magical, massive Lake Michigan.

I love this town.  I visit the city two or three times a year.  I love it more in the spring and summer months. The winters can get bitterly cold with the biting winds, but winter visitors can still explore the indoor museums, art institutes and great restaurants. 

Experience the city and enjoy the best it has to offer.  A few of my favorite places and Hot Times in Old Town include:  eating a deep dish pizza, but saving room for a bag of Chicago’s famous gourmet popcorn, shopping on Magnificent Mile (Michigan Ave), a trip to the Willis Tower (formerly the Sears Tower), studying the skyline and the building architect, Navy Pier, Lincoln Park Zoo, catching a game at Wrigley Field or depending on the time of year, watch the Stanley Cup Champions, a Blackhawks hockey game, Millennium Park, listening to jazz, Double Decker bus tours, Hancock observatory, Buckingham Fountain, Chicago River,  and  antique shopping on Armitage Avenue.

There is so much to see and do in Chi-town, that I always have plenty left over for my next visit. 

Chicago, until next time! 

Let me know if you have ever visited the Windy City?  Where’s your favorite city to visit?  What are your favorite things to do while visiting a new place? 

To all my Chicago high school friends and FB friends, I love ya and love your city! 

Things I have learned in LIFE and other Random thoughts: 

• I learned that valet parking for the day in Chicago costs more than my daily car rental. 
• I learned that Lake Michigan is like the ocean, without the salt.
• On my next visit to Lake Michigan I’m going to bury metal objects in the sand that say “get a life” on them.
• I learned that Chicago hotel rooms can be on the small side.  Room service? Send up a larger room.
• Why it is my hotel room is always chilled to an icy fifty degrees, when outside it’s a pleasant seventy degrees?
• To really appreciate the multifaceted group of Chicagoans, ride the El. 
• The El (Elevated Train) is more than the Chicago transportation system, it’s an elevated ride in Twilight Zone; especially if you have a transfer pass…you may never get off.   
• I found out the hard way why they call it “The Loop”. 
• Lake Michigan’s beach sand is hot, but the water is frigid even in the middle of the summer.
• The giant faces on the video screens in Grant Park, are called ART, but are a little creepy. 
• Chicago is; an occasional snooty bartender. 
• Millennium Park features a giant mirrored egg-shaped cloud that resembles a women’s compact reflecting the city’s skyline and the distorted people walking around it. 
• I learned that the McDonald’s inside the Chicago loop looks like something out of The Jetsons. 
• I realized as I sank my teeth into my favorite deep dish pizza, I was at the wrong favorite pizzeria.  Pizzeria Due, Pizzeria Uno, both with green awnings, both with basement level seating, identical menus and sidewalk patios and within a mere 100 yards apart, who knew? 
• While driving in downtown Chicago, it’s a good idea to slow it down so you don’t flatten unsuspecting tourists.   Pedestrians in masses, definitely have the right-of-way.   
• I learned whenever I need a full urban experience I visit Chicago. 
• Be careful in some sectors of Chicago.  The most common 911 call in some areas is “Shots fired.”
• I learned the tollway pass in rental cars do NOT always work, and when they don’t you can tie up traffic for miles.
• Gourmet “chocolate” Carmel popcorn makes my chocolate level on my food pyramid.
• Chocolate covered popcorn should not be eaten in bed …as if my hotel carpet wasn’t already sticky enough.  Ew. 
• I learned that the State of Illinois does highway construction during rush hour…which is mostly all day.
• The traffic was moving smoothly a few days later.  I learned that the construction workers were on strike that day. 
• I learned that the it costs 3 dollars to sit for an hour on the Skyway Toll Bridge, but it’s free to get lost in Gary, Indiana’s downtown (Chicago’s East side). 
• Stay away from the hotels that advertise, “a short run to the EL.” 
• If you really want to talk about da Bears or da Cubs, then sit at da bar of any pizza shop.

What is your favorite city to visit?  What are your favorite things to do while visiting a new place? 

Trump Tower from my cab.

Chicago Transit started putting advertisements on the ceilings of buses and el trains. This is an ad in the el Train for US Cellular, although, I’m not sure how the question is connected to phone service, but I’ll take the Chocolate LIPS !    

Chi COW go

Home of the Chicago Cow Parade, some of the bovines are still grazing around town. 

Ice on the beach makes wading slippery

Lake Michigan beaches are magical even in the Winter.  But summer is much more fun!  Enjoy!

Many people are taking vacations this month.  For the past few years people have not been traveling because of the slow economy.  Now people are tired of hiding under their beds and instead are saying “let’s go visit grandma this summer.”  The Fourth of July weekend alone will have 35 million travelers.  And 90% of those travelers will be by car.  Whether you are traveling by car or plane, you most likely will have travel stories and lessons you have learned.  I’d love to hear about them.  Where are you planning a vacation?  Are you traveling by car or plane? 

What I have learned in life:

• Ok, kids in preparation for our vacation, let’s start with our first road game- the suitcase race, where each of you will be timed while packing your luggage. 

• Packing; you won’t be graded on it, it won’t be on your permanent record and neatness doesn’t count. 

• In fact, all that counts is getting the dang suitcase packed!

• What I learned in life, when traveling with kids on a road trip, do you notice that the souvenirs at all the rest stops are the same but the names on them changed? 

• “Road trips”, a term that really means, “I’m going to kill those kids when we get home.” 

• The constant humming of the horns of the world soccer cup on my TV are enough to make me go batty, until I open a door and the buzzing and clicking noises of the cicadas combined with multitudes of insects and frogs drone out the monotone sounds of the Vuvuzelas!

• Finally… rain in our town silenced the orchestra of cicadas and the chorus of frogs.  And the US loss to Ghana skidded the constant soccer games on our TV to a halt and silenced the horn blowing.

• Who knew the Ghanaians were so good at soccer?  

• This summer our house is the epicenter for teenage gatherings.  I learned that during the day while teenagers are ravaging the house, I’d prefer the loud and raucous sounds of a stadium full of vuvuzela blowing soccer fans.

• I have learned that teenagers are nocturnal.

• My son waited in line for 10 hours in hopes to nab the first shipment of new iphone  4, only to find out he was in line for only the case.

• My new iphone is thinner than me, smarter than me and can multi-task better than me. 

• Steve Jobs said the new iphone doesn’t like to be held…really?  I guess it can’t do everything. 

• I learned that traveling by plane is just as adventurous as by car.

• I learned not to worry when you see an airplane fly by you in the friendly skies, unless you can watch their movie. 

• Most airplane collisions that are near misses happen while taxing on a runway.  So how does a pilot just miss a plane that jumped out in front of him?  Oops, I didn’t see you hiding there behind the tree.

• I learned that there are a lot of single dating ads in the inflight magazines.  Are there really that many singles flying? 

•  Bikinis Meet Hazmat Suits

• After four SWA flights, I learn that if I eat another bag of peanuts, I think I’ll be drinking water from my trunk.

• At least I can’t complain anymore about airplane food.  It’s hard to screw up peanuts and pretzels.

• I learned that it is not a good feeling when your plane backs away from the gate and is traveling at high speeds on a wet runaway and the little boy in front is yelling, “ Four, three, two , one, BLAST OFF!”

• I have learned that these people never make good seat mates on a plane; a psychic, TMI Sally(Too much information), someone who just got out of prison (you think I’m kidding), a flirtatious person, a complainer, a student that wants help with their homework, someone practicing FengShui, someone afraid of flying, a giggler, a foreigner trying to obtain their green card, a snorter, an Amway salesperson trying to recruit you, a mom with newborn twins, a hypochondriac,  someone with Tourette’s syndrome or your Mother-in-Law.

• Our airline has a 5/10 rule.  Any kids under the age of 10 have to be asleep within 5 minutes after takeoff, or we’ll stow them in the overhead compartment.

• How many Southwest airline agents does it take to decorate the gate area for the fourth…way too many. One to hold the scissors, one to hold the tape, one to stand on the ladder and hang the crepe paper and several to watch to make sure it is hung right. 

• Have you ever sat in an Exit row?  What a huge responsibility. Please read the 110 page booklet on exit door procedures… the door weighs 60 pounds, but make sure you toss it away from the  plane…remember if we land in water the back of the plane will go under first, so all the passenger behind you will rush forward…speak to all the passengers in English…(like I’m suddenly going to remember how to yell “jump” in another language)… if you feel like your life is in danger, jump out first…duh, see you later alligator.

• If we can do anything to improve your flight, let us know, as you are departing the plane. 

• Seriously, if you want a beverage on this flight, remember that there are only 3 of us and 130 of you, and it’s a brief 55 minute flight, but sure go ahead and order a beverage.

• As they point out the safety features of the Boeing 737, let us show you how to buckle your seatbelt.   Really?  Do we need to know how to buckle our seatbelts?  Anyone that has been in an automobile since 1968 knows how to buckle a seatbelt. 

• In the event of loss of oxygen, put on your mask first and if you’re traveling with two children, pick your favorite child and put their mask on next.

• If you don’t like us, there are six ways to leave us, two exits in the front, two in middle and two in the rear of the plane. 

• We’re going to dim the cabin lights.  We hope most of you will go to sleep.

• We have reached our cruising altitude of 10,000 feet and six inches.

• I learned that the best landing is the landing that you can sleep through and it’s smooth as butter.

• No blanket, no in-flight meal, no laptop, no iPod, no book, no newspaper, no standing, no carryon. Threat level now at Berserk. Enjoy your flight.

• I can’t figure out why chocolate is just another snack to my hubby.

• I need a vacation from my vacation.

• Why do they call it a two man pup tent anyway?  It shouldn’t be used by two men or a pup. 

• It’s a funny thing about our nation. The 4^th of July is its birthday, but April 15th is when it collects the presents.

• The Fourth of July, the holiday where we combine alcohol and explosives.

• I learned that 4^th picnics are a family gathering that is fun for about 30 minutes. 

• Nothing more says, “Happy Birthday America” than an hour long fireworks display!

For many people this holiday is a lot more than a day off from work. It’s a time to pay tribute.  In this country, it’s a great way to remember all the people that gave their lives for us.  Happy Fourth of July!!

Where are you planning a vacation?  Are you traveling by car or plane?  Let me hear about your adventures! 

Fireworks 4th of July Del Mar Ca

My daughter Courtney took this photo  from her iphone while in Del Mar, California.

This weekend as Americans celebrate the “birthday” of the United States of America with flags, BBQs, fireworks and picnics, I am reminded of a story about my daughter’s eighth birthday where we commemorated the Fourth of July and her birthday with a fish fight.   

I’m known around our circles as the “Martha Stewart” of entertaining.  Even my children’s birthday parties were becoming more elaborate as the children got older.  Lissa’s 8^th birthday was no exception.  I wanted it to be magical and memorable.  It was memorable alright.  It was a birthday party that any kid that attended would always remember.   

I had been planning her birthday bash for weeks.  That year, my daughter had a love for dolphins and wanted to be a marine biologist when she grew up.  I planned a red, white and blue nautical theme for her birthday.  I covered our wood patio table with bags and bags of white sand and seashells and starfish. The centerpiece for the table was a fish bowl lined with red and blue crystal marbles and radiant live fish.

I had picked out three gorgeous fish for the center bowl; a red, a white and a blue fantailed Betta.  They were the main attraction for all the boys and girls.  The fish kept the rambunctious, highly energized eight year olds from running around wild from being pumped full of adrenaline with party excitement.

At cake time, my daughter and her friends were so thrilled to be able to make sand paintings on the table and to watch the beautiful long tailed fish swimming in the bowl in the center of the table.  
Everything was perfect. 

Pam, the party planner extraordinaire had every detail covered, with one small exception; Bettas are called Siamese fighting fish for a reason.  Who knew?  I had no idea that a dominant male Betta would fight to death to protect his territory and that Bettas should not be placed together in a small environment. 

Yep, you guessed it.

Within a short while the blue Betta puffed up his brilliant colors and began chasing and attacking the red Betta! At first they acted like two cats chasing each other and nipping at each other’s tails.  But soon it became apparent that this was aggression, not playfulness.

Then the white Betta decided to flex his muscles and he too got in on the action.  He flared up his brilliant iridescent fins to make himself look bigger and more menacing.  He began attacking the blue Betta.  It was a fin flaring contest, albeit red, white and blue, accompanied by fireworks and tail nipping.  Who knew Bettas were little Piranhas.   When I look back at the whole incident, I marvel at the interesting phenomenon of the way Bettas puff out in aggression.  But not that day.

At first the kids thought they were cute, and just innocent fish rough housing, until pieces of the red Bettas fluffy fins started falling off and floating to the bottom of the bowl. 

Lissa screeched and screamed, “Mom, they’re eating each other!” 

“No, honey, they’re just playing,” I said staring at the bowl.   But it did appear that they were attacking each other and the blue one was indeed nibbling on the red ones long, but tasting looking fins.

The three fish were putting on quite a show with all the chasing and biting of their fins and heads.

The bowl soon became a plethora of torn fish pieces.  Red, white and blue fins, tails and scales floated in the milky water.  Unknown to me and the kids, the “males” were trying to figure out their “pecking” order.   

The kids were screaming as I ran around looking for anything that would work as a net.   I couldn’t find a net.  There was no way I was sticking my hand in the bowl to separate the aggressive Bettas.  I pictured my fingers going in to grab the fish and being nipped until I pulled out only my finger bone.

A wounded fish floated to the bottom of the bowl while a group of little girls watched on in tears.  WARNING: Do not watch this show with young kids!  

The boys watched with fascination as the fish fought.  Some even pulled their chairs closer to the action.  Great.   Nothing like a patio full of little munchkins in a frenzied motion yelling and screaming at a bowl full of fighting Siamese fish.  This party had plenty of liveliness with the wrong distractions and excitement.

In a freakish Frankensteinian fashion, I had created a monster of a mess.  A memorable birthday party for sure.  I felt like Hannibal Lecter’s fish hating cousin.    

Staying in the party master of ceremonies mode, I finally scooped the fish out of the bowl and separated them into plastic cups.  I salvaged the party with silly tactics like, “look the fish are smiling now” and “look their wagging their tails, so they’re happy again.”  Their tails resembled a tattered fringed flag. 

Separated at last the fish and the kids both settled down.  The kids were not so traumatized that they would not eat cake.  Needless to say I had to forgo the game, “pin the tail on the fish.”  And my “catch of the day” treats of fish shaped gummies threaded on a pretzel fishing poles, did not make it out of the kitchen. 

I heard later on that the kids talked about it for many weeks after.  “Mommy can I have a fish attack birthday party like Lissa had?” 

As I tucked my daughter into bed that night, I made a mental note to cancel the pot belly pig party for my son.  

How have you celebrated your kids birthday parties?   What do you have planned for the fourth?  Do you have any crazy “pet” stories? 

More children’s jewelry containing the dangerous metal cadmium made the recall list this week.  “Happy” charm bracelets and football rings that were handed out at doctor and dentist offices around the country for the past five years were recalled by SmileMakers Inc., of Spartanburg, S.C. 

The jewelry contains high levels of cadmium, which is toxic if ingested by children and can cause adverse health effects.  About 66,200 charm bracelets and 2,200 rings made in China were recalled. 

The “Happy” charm bracelet is comprised of colorful beads on a small elastic band to which a metal charm in the shape of a butterfly, moon or sun is attached. The football ring is a small adjustable metal band to which a football charm (made of metal) is attached.

For more information call SmileMakers at 877-390-5470  or visit http://www.smilemakers.com.

For information about any recall can be found on the Consumer Product Safety Commission website at http://www.cpsc.gov.        

Charm Bracelets Recalled

Football Rings Recalled

The CPSC recalled this week baby walkers because they can fit through a standard doorway and are not designed to stop at the edge of a step. Babies using these walkers can be seriously injured or killed due to falling. 

No injuries or incidents have been reported, but the CPSC is urging consumers to stop using the walkers immediately and return them to the store where they were purchased for a full refund.

The recalled walkers are intended for babies 6 months and older.  The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP.org) has recommended that walkers be banned from the market, and they are banned in Canada. Consumer Reports does not consider walkers a safe option. Baby walkers that don’t meet the nationally recognized stair-fall safety standard (like the model in this recall) continue to be sold and recalled in the U.S.   Consumer reports agree that walkers can pose a safety hazard—even if they meet the safety standard.

The simple fact remains: Babies in walkers can move with surprising speed, and as long as the walkers have wheels, no standard or testing can make them safe.

The baby walkers have a plastic frame supported by four wheels and eight brake pads. The walkers were sold in blue, pink, and green with a white activity tray and patterned, vinyl seat. 

The walkers were sold at small juvenile product stores in California, Illinois, New York and Texas from January 2007 through December 2009 for between $25 and $30 and were manufactured in China and imported by  Suntech Enterprises Inc., of Commerce, Calif.

For additional information, contact Suntech Enterprises toll-free at (888) 268-8139  between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. PT Monday through Friday.

Baby Walkers Recalled

Dad, now that I’m a parent myself, I know what you and mom went through…HELL.

• Dad, my kids often remind me of myself and my siblings when I was a kid- happy now?  Sure go ahead and laugh.
• Dad, whenever I run into life’s little problems- I think back to all the advice you’ve given me.  Damn, I wish I would have been listening.
• Sure grandpa, now that the kids are all jacked up on candy and sodas, it’s time to take them back to mom and dad.
• Dad, can you offer any helpful advice on raising teenagers?  Uh, pointing and laughing isn’t advice.
• On Mother’s Day my kids brought me breakfast in bed.  On Father’s Day the only way my hubby is getting breakfast in bed is if he sleeps in the kitchen.
• I learned that my hubby shouldn’t complain about all my pairs of shoes.  He has twice as many wrenches that he never uses. 
• Why does he have so many different size and shape wrenches anyway? 
• When our dryer broke, my husband said he could fix it…if he had the right size wrench!  
• I learned that hunting through a man’s toolbox is worse than a man hunting through a ladies purse. 
• I learned how to remove a cork from a bottle of wine without an opener, leave it in the freezer overnight.
• I learned I’m the ambulance driver in my family.  Last week my daughter went to the ER for strep throat, and then my hubby needed stitches in his forehead, and then my son had a slight concussion from being checked into the boards in hockey.    You’ll recognize me in the car pool line; I’m the car with a red cross painted on it. 
• There’s something about the hot weather that makes some people get a little frisky with their fashion choices.   Edgy stilettos and barely there short dresses, really?
• I’m still trying to figure out when Hawaiian Bermuda shorts, Jackie-O sunglasses, and tank tops went out- of- style?  Where’s Miuccia Prada when I need her? 
• I learned that faux tanners don’t work for me; I end up looking like a sick zebra.
• When did Military styles come back?  I just sold all my cargo pants and camouflage at my garage sale only to find the same get-ups at the department stores. 
• Wait, that’s skinny pants with cargo pockets to be worn with double platforms and a sequin tee?  Never mind.
• My diet is a constant battle between, sweetened or unsweetened, broiled or fried, chocolate or double chocolate.
• I learned that as I get older, everything droops.  Even my chin looks longer than it did ten years ago.  I’m turning into Jay Leno.
• I bought some herbal tea that is supposed to help my memory but I forgot where I put it.
• I can tell its summer, our back yard smells like tiki torch fuel and bug spray. 
• I learned it’s probably time to cut back on the chlorine in the pool when the beach ball melts. 
• Summer eating is fun; since all the men want to be chefs, especially competitive dads, they want to bar-b-que where no man has bbq before!  Go for it! 
• Smoke bacon explosion, smoke duck, and smoked cheesecake… count me in.
• After football, basketball and hockey…at last baseball & golf, two whistle free sports most men can sleep through. 
• We’re trying to plan a family vacation.  There’s no such thing as fun for the whole family. 
• Is it just me, or am I really turning into my mother? 
• I want to get chocolate wasted!
• Forget having a nose for smelling the wine boutique; I need a trained nose to sniff out Gulf Seafood for oil. 
• I worry the oil spill will cause fish stick prices to go up.
• Now that summer is here, I don’t have to cook breakfast for the kids because they wake up at noon.
• You shouldn’t be eating candy so early. We have donuts.
• My motto for my teenage kids, “No drinking, no drugs, no sex ’til you’re dead.”
• I learned that you don’t choose your family; they are god’s gift to you. 

Happy Father’s Day to all the dads in the world!

What are you doing for Father’s Day?  What did you learn in LIFE?